10 Things I Want You to Know

Some things I live by; some things I find very important to me.

1. When life is weird, when life feels like a free fall, when life gets all twisty and stuff— lie in bed with the windows open, turn on some ambient music and go online or grab a book and read about things that make you happy. Whether it is about the new movie coming out based on your favorite novel, or it is about that new kind of jellyfish that was just discovered in Monterey— read about it. It keeps you grounded in the real life things that make you happy and glad to live in this world.

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   Avoid saying “I hate…”. It’s very aggressive, it’s very negative, and you don’t genuinely hate the thing. I understand certain things, like, “I hate racism.” or “I hate misogyny.” That use of language is understandable. But, “Ugh I hate mushrooms on pizza.” or “I hate that book” or “I hate that actress.” is a bit harsh. There are people who thoroughly enjoy those fungi, people who obsess over that book; and please understand the fact that that actress is a human being, honey. Be gentle. Do not steer towards aggression and resentment. For some it flows unconsciously, and I get that, but be mindful, because it does add (or detract) a lot from a situation. Think about it; it will make you a softer person.

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   Nothing good happens after 2 am… or 1am. I read that somewhere. I never heeded that advice, but I still believe it’s true. Things get weird at that time. But, I mean, you do you. I’m still gonna stay up with my dorm-mates and watch movies and eat pizzas at 2 in the morning, but take this advice in for a little bit and consider it.

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   Feel free to be awed by the world. Be awed by fireworks, be awed by symphonies, be awed by the stillness of bodies of water, be awed by relations between living things. Love light filtering through leaves and love the irises of someone you care for. You are never too cool or whatever to geek out over your favorite song being played. Never apologize for loving something harmless. Continue to appreciate the world around you.

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   Cut your nails and brush your hair and teeth. Take showers, even if you’re too tired to. Clean body, clean mind, clean heart. It helps. 

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   Drink lots and lots of water. It will be worth the peeing later. Also, take Vitamin C tablets and Centrum Energy Vitamins. Also, carry around things you don’t need (hair-ties, chapstick, a lighter, pads and tampons, Advil or Ibuprofen, perfume, a pen, etc.) just in case someone else needs it. You never know when they’ll need it, and it’s always good to be prepared. Also it’s good for when kids run up to you on a scavenger hunt asking if you have anything to trade for a paper clip. That happened to me the other day. I gave them a business card. Their excitement was uplifting. Little pleasures are uplifting.

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   Seek closure. Do not let something eat you alive. You will always need someone to talk to. Really. You do. You cannot bottle it up on your own, or it will slowly burn you from the inside out. There will be times when writing isn’t enough. There will be times when you can’t type or write any faster than your mind is moving. And speaking to someone about it is very important. Be strong and care for yourself. 

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   Clear it all off. Put your laundry in a hamper or drawer at the end of every night. Clean your workspace off or organize it at the end of every night. 

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   Keep your mind open. Avoid the words “ugly” and “retarded”. Do not assume you know everything. Know when to stop. Know when you are being too much, respect those around you. Be mindful of your tone. Be mindful of how you present yourself. Be mindful of the content that comes out of your mouth. Be mindful in general. Do not disregard the drought. Do not disregard the important things. Grant gravity to situations that rightfully deserve gravity. And have the ability to discern what to release. Do not cry over cracked phone screens; do not cry over spilled milk.

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    Everything will be okay. Smile through everything. Smile and laugh. Laugh at the ridiculousness over certain situations. It is never the end of the world. What is in the past is in the past. If you have no control over something, then let it go. Do not let it affect your mood or your opinion of yourself or who you are. Whatever you gave in the moments that did matter is all you could give. And nothing can be done about it. And that’s not sad; that’s life. So you might as well accept it, learn from it, and carry on.

You’re doing just fine, buddy. ❤